Lost in Fog
by leadAstray
Summary: that's what you get for running after something you are not to run after: a place in the ranks of royal protestant order of Hellsing
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: **don't own anything except Raphael McCloud…in fact, if you would own hellsing, would you write something like a fanfiction in your OWN fandom??

Chapter I London Night

He ran. Flew almost. No, this one wouldn't escape him.

His feet hammered on the ground, the air-filled lungs nearly burst under the immense pressure. He mentally smirked „wonderful, I'm on the heels of this bloody whatever runs in front of me and I lack oxygen…well, McCloud, old boy, if smoking wouldn't be so dammed cool…"

Pain crept into his feet, laming them. A shaky hand threw off his night vision glasses and his helmet. „moon's up, no use for that….and if I hit the grounds tonight through this weirdo, at least I want to look him in the eyes….provided that he has some…".

The same shaky hand also released his upper body from the heavy gear he wore. The weight lost, he felt like gaining speed. A rush of Adrenaline pounded through his veins, breathing already was a torture.

His mind closed in. He just saw the being in front of him. And always running…dashing through the deserted alleys of the nocturnal London…He grew closer. He was now able to get a clearer vision of his prey. Something what seemed to be long, slender legs moved in rhythmic circles and carried the being over the asphalt. Bewilderment sneaked up his mind. Though the night was very clear and light, he couldn't envision the being exactly. In fact, he saw NOTHING; felt like being blind when looking on the creature. As if it was born out of pure shadow…

„Christ, I wouldn't wonder if I grabbed into plain air when trying to touch it…speaking of which…"

His mind raced. He was very close now, he could almost touch it. No, he didn't reach for his gun on his waist. In fact, this was the very reason why he was running after the creature; it had resisted their shoots.

„Alright boy…see who gets to hell this night" A roar escaped his lungs as he flung himself forward; every muscle on his body was tensed as he flew through the air. „Yeah!!!!" He mentally beamed as his body hit the creature; but as soon as he touched it, a strange shiver ran through his body…as if some cold fog would have crept into his heart somehow…He pushed this strange sensation aside and summoned every bit of strength and tried to pin the creature on the ground. A fist hit his cheek, hard…

„So you've got fire in your fist, eh? See if you can handle this, vermin!" His voice echoed in the narrow lane, breath disappearing in shades of grey as he hardened his fists and rammed them into the shadowy corpus of the creature with all his might. He expected a scream, a howl at least, but all that sounded in the darkness was a long and hollow laugh.

„What the…?"

Suddenly the creature seized his head with a strength that terrified the Junior Officer. It forced him to meet his eyes. Eyes of pure crimson were looking into the young mans face, tearing the surface and burning right into his soul. The cold that had crept into his heart literally roared up, threatened to bury him in a grave of bitter grey ashes. The being grinned; purest fear rose in his body; he felt like a rabbit in front of a snake. He felt his head being pulled down, not the slightest sign of effort was to read in the creatures face. It yanked the collar of his attire and exposed his neck. The Junior Officer, who knelt above the being felt his strength fade away, he felt sleepy, so sleepy…the last thing he noticed was cold breath against his neck as the bang of shot tearing flesh was heard. The cruel but yet so tragically familiar sound snapped the paralysed young man back into consciousness again. Shaking his throbbing head, he suddenly noticed that something lacked…His mind kicked in.

„Christ, where the hell are you???" All that was left of the monster he had hunted was a bit of dust that was fastly taken by the wind. The strained soldier got up on feet that felt like jelly. Narrow eyes tried to pierce the darkness.

„Where it is is not your concern anymore." A smooth voice rang out of the night. He saw a solitary figure escaping the darkness and moving towards him. His vision was still a little dizzy because of the punch he recieved for it took him quite a wile to envision the speaker fully. The voice had told him before that the stranger must be female; what he saw now just asserted this.

The soldier saw a petite young woman with about nineteen or twenty summers under her belt.

Her eyes were hidden behind thin, red-tinted spectalces, which was the first think that cought his attention. She was clad in a, if rather odd, sort of uniform made up of a _very_ short skirt, high military boots and vest. The patch she bore on her left upper arm was completeley unknown to him. But what really cought his eye was the weapon she carried. He had seen somesuch just once, on the academy in the course for extraordinary weaponry. The Basuca had about twice the height of the girl, but she seemed to carry it without any effort. She spoke up again.

„As said, Mr…." She obviously was searching for his name-patch….He dimly remembered tossing away his body armour where his name and rank were recorded.

„McCloud, Officer". He emphasised his rank; no way an arrogant girlie could intimedate him, regardless how many basucas or what mysterious patches she carried. The stranger noticed the emphasis.

„Alright, Officer McCloud…" She took a step closer. „It would be better if you left now. I have serious investigations to do and I don't need a layman hanging around while I deal with the others, so if you would please…" with the last words, she put one arm on his shoulder and tried to push him aside: The young man didn't as he was told…A furious glance met his eyes.

„Look, mate! This is not like playing soldier like you and your chaps are doing; this is beyond your terms!"

No he had enough. He stepped in her way; his voice laced with ferocity.

„Listen, blondie…Three of my men hit the ground dead or worse because of those….those…things" He waved his hand through the air forcefully, „and I don't intend steppin' aside and pretend that I never saw anything, hear me? I chased this thing for about 40 minutes through at least the half of fucking London, I nearly bit the dust, I have not the faintest idea what is going on and I demand some answers now, dammit!" The last words echoed through the alley, his surprise about the rather unknown force in his voice was nearly as big as his anger.

The woman took her glasses off, smirking. For a moment, the only thing that tore the silence was the sharp sound of rapidly breathed in air. His anger was literally blown away by the sight of red eyes mustering him.

The woman was totally aware of the sight she cut. She mentally smirked "oh my, brave boy, are we frightended, hmmm? Well, now is the time to run off, screaming 'monster' and find yourself again in a sanatorium without the faintest memory….well, maybe you remember never to be unkind to young ladies with red eyes…." She mustered the mans face, could read the exhaustion in it. She didn't wonder; to chase a ghoul was not exactly comfortable, to actually catch him was nearly impossible for a mortal like him. An unwanted smile etched her mouth; she surprised herself with the thought of actually telling this mortal what exactly he chased…

"Um…m'Lady…." His voice was bareley a whisper. "Maybe we didn't have a good start together…" taking a deep breathe, he tried to compose himself, "…um, I see you are an officer as well, although I can't recognize your patch…anyway. What matters is that members of my unit found death tonight by this being and I feel damn guilty for this….for their lives stood under my responsibility, and my lack of knowledge caused their death in the end…and…."

She troubled him; usually he was quite capable of reading emotions in peoples faces. Hers was too mystified, even for him. His words dried form his lips.

The woman, on the other hand, was quite entertained by the startled sight of the man. "Oh yes…sometimes vampirism has its advantages…." She was interrupted forcefully in between her musings; a voice rang…for an instant she wasn't sure weather the man could hear it or not; she watched his eyes grow wide. Yes, he heard it.

"My, my, police girl, give him the lecture…" the deep basso without a visible source said. The womans head snapped around, her face, for the first time, full of emotions. "Give him the lecture???" her voice sounded high-pitched, nervous, "But…he is a….a…"

"He's just an unknowing Junior Officer, frightened out of his wits, hmm? Somehow he reminds me of some…", the shadows seemed to form a corpus, a tall figure appeared behind the woman, clad in a red attrie, the eyes also hid behind googles. "…of someone, don't you feel that way, police girl?" the last lines were laced with sarcasm, the hand of the man rested on the womans shoulder during the phrase 'police girl'. She, on the other hand, seemed to have lost her composure completely.

"Don't you start; this cannot be compared!" her nervouseness increased.

"Oh, you are right. He doesn't seem to crumble on the ground pathetically any time soon, does he?"

"Thanks for reminding me….but that doesn't justify giving him the lecture! I know you are not really concerned by the regular ways of recruiting new members, but he has neither rank nor experience…" Her lips betrayed her, both men were quite capable of reading the unspoken phrase from her mouth; but while the one just was more confused, the other smirked at the line 'and there is no need for you to bite him'.

Why the hell should Sir Hellsing be interested in a new recruit anyway?

"Oh, Sir Hellsings interests are not so much of my concern…"

"So why…? And why him?! He tried to knock out a ghoul he chased thourgh half of London! This fact should be the only prove that he is completely insane! A daredevil! An arrogant little…mortal."

"My, police girl, did the arrogant little mortal hurt your feelings? Seriously, just look at him! He ran for about 40 minutes on high speed after a ghoul and he isn't dead yet."

"But…"

Completeley ignoring the woman's protests, the tall man turned to face the object of their "conversation". A smirk played round his lips; he reached into the voluminous pocket of his trench-coat and produced a neat pack of cigarettes.

"Well, does the arrogant little mortal want a cigarette?"

His hand reached out and touched the smooth surface of the offered cigarette. Placing it in one corner of his mouth, his consciousness slowly returned again. The tall stranger offered him a lighter and took one cigarette himself. A soothing silence spread among them, the young officer enjoyed the cigarette, his mind settled again. He ran one hand through his tangled hair and opened the collar of his vest; slowly, his breath found its normal rhythm again. Shaking his head, he smirked. The tall man noticed that and spoke up:

"Liked it?"

He looked up. Neither the man nor the woman were "mortal", he felt it. Some strange feeling crept up his back that with trying to catch one monster, he got himself into something far more complicated and wicked that he could imagine. The man was grinning at him, a mad grin it was…and almost daring. The young man raised an eyebrow, returning the grin.

"Loved it!"

"Good then…." He turned to the still startled woman to his right, "I will inform Sir Hellsing about our new recruit….tata!" He seemed to melt into the shadows.

"New recruit?!" simultaneously the two now left-alones blurted out. Then, completely out of their wits, they looked at each other. Just a slight shaking of his head gave away his state of mind, he was completely dumb-founded. He blew the smoke up in the air and followed its clouds absentmindly; leaning against the wall. His mind wandered through the events of the evening, sorting them out, relaxing. Suddenly he grinned, not the daring grin he wore in front of the stranger, no, this time it was a calm yet very radiating grin.

He pulled himself up again, was finally coming to terms with this strange night. Still smiling, he reached out a hand.

"McCloud, Raphael. Delighted to meet you, miss; might I ask your name as well?"

Still a bit confused, the young woman answered.

"Seras Victoria, special officer of…", she hesitated, "alright, you might as well know, special officer of The Hellsing Organisation. So, fellow, tell me, do you have the faintest hint of an idea of what is going on?"

"No, but I am eagerly awaiting the lecture", he grinned roughish.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter II Getting Lost

The two of them walked though the silent streets of London in equal silence. He felt strange; felt like following this woman meant following into a live beyond everything he knew. Beyond his terms of understanding and far, far away into a world he was yet afraid to enter…But something in his mind felt that he had yet taken this first step into this deep and dark world this woman was about to lead him to.

He looked into the wide nightsky, still hearing her calm voice in his ears. In the recent 90 minutes, his live had turned upside down; what has been a, if not exactly constant and safe, at least an official place in the ranks of D11. He tried to take a look at this mysterious thing that represented his live now; by chasing the ghoul and taking part in the strange conversation with the two strangers afterwards, he had managed to get himself into an organisation which was under the queens protection and which had the god-given task to banish all undead….."In the name of God, all impure souls of the living dead shall be banished into eternal damnation. Amen."

Amen...the sacral word echoed in his head; he had never said it with this certain emphasis before. In fact, with this new position of his, he was somehow forced to contemplain his believe over and over again….not an exactly comforting task. Especially for a former novice who fled the church, who fled this hollow and cold god that he was forced to represent.

He shook his head, strands of dark hair fell into his face; he was brushing them away with a still gloved hand. As he touched his forehead with his fingers, he felt something wet running down his face. He glanced at his hand, found his glove soaked with blood, as well as his whole arm; he stopped in his pace. Ripped down the blood-soaked sleeve and gave away the sight of a nearly nine inch long gash running down the inside of his arm...'_must have been this…being'_…The sight of his blood dripping down on the cold streets of London somehow paralysed him; he felt not the slightest pain. Slowly, he pressed his other hand on the gash, bending the injured arm slightly.

"Ah, Miss! Do you happen to have something to stop the bleedi…" he couldn't finish his sentence, the officer in front of him whirled around, he backed away, holding his arm protectively against his chest. He saw a strange light in the woman's eyes, felt some sort of panic rising in his chest. He felt a wall against his back…Meanwhile, the woman with this strange name had lowered her head, he was now unable to see her eyes. Something in his mind told him to run, to flee, to escape, this being was not longer human. She approached him, lifted her head again, he saw her mouth open, strangely long fangs were seen in it. She started to speak.

"Be careful not to get injured near me… it wouldn't do you any good." Mechanically, she reached into one of her pockets and tossed him a bundle of bandages which he slowly picked up, never leaving her unwatched. He tightened the fabric around his arm, something told him not to leave a strand of his blood to be seen. Meanwhile, Seras had started walking again, and he also picked up his pace again, jogging up to her. Their eyes met, he found the faintest hint of shame in her so strangely red eyes. For several moments, he felt the urge to speak to her, wanted to reach out a hand and just touch her….something held him back.

The sharp yell of an owl snapped her out of her lethargy; she felt him walk beside her, felt through her supernatural senses that he was frightened. And she knew it, oh she knew it so well…but yet he didn't say anything to cover the situation as she would have thought he would do…as far as she was concerned, he had proven himself as a daredevil so far…

But yet she was somehow grateful that he didn't start into screaming insults and running off into the night, babbling about monsters and murder like so many of the others have done before. Even though she had given him insight in the existence of vampires like herself, even though by the time he knew of ghouls, of freaks and the need of silver bullets, she felt like with his speechlessness he had lifted some of the weight off hers shoulders…at least for now, for now that he shared her loneliness.

She relaxed a bit. She had to admit to herself that he had proven not unsatisfactory until now, maybe she would give him a second chance…Maybe she would give him this chance just to spend some time in this comforting acceptance he spread out. Maybe she would give him this chance just to have one reminder of the human world she was once part of around her…

Her steps led them into the more noble parts of London, he looked around him. Still somehow being the poor boy who grew up in the slums of Dublin, he was now taken by the sight of the old Victorian mansion that was illuminated by a soft blue light.

The woman who accompanied him walked beyond the gates as he stopped dead. Something in his legs flicked and he was forced to rest motionless, taking in the sheer yet intimidating beauty of the estate bathed in silence.

"coming or what?" she was totally aware of his fascination and took sly advantage of it. No doubt, this boy has never been in such a house. Slowly, he made his way to her side again and together they strode into the house. The heavy iron gate gave a suffering noise as it swung open, giving way to a long and hollow hallway, bordered by huge grey pillars. He heard his steps hallowing off the huge thick walls as the only sound who tore the silence. The knot in his chest grew thicker as he noticed a lithe figure standing on top of a double staircase. Once again he stopped dead. Big round glasses blinked in the crisp light, sheer blonde hair and a fine face formed an image of intimidating beauty reflecting off the ageless man on top of the staircase.


	3. Chapter 3

Enrolled in Unit III

Seeing the red haired woman turning, he took in her nonchalant expression and yet was more intimidated. Unsurely, he ran a hand through his tangled curls and shook his head, shy. He felt suddenly terribly out of place, covered in road dust and blood, being presented to this blonde man like prey, ready to be feasted on. The man descended the stairs and walked past Seras, who nodded slightly, her body stiffening as she was addressed by him. He then proceeded in walking towards him; with every step he grew more confused as the grey suite revealed female forms. A sweat drop travelled down his forehead and was brushed away by a nervous hand. His eyes took in the sheer and yet so intimidating beauty of the – now rather obvious – woman who now stopped mere inches from his face.

Never in his entry live did he feel so nervous, shaky almost. Being a notorious flirter, he was seldom taken aback by a woman, but this particular one managed to get him completely out of his wits.

"Name?" her stern voice demanded

"…"

"Seras, is he able to speak?" His peripheric vision took in a bemused expression of the vampiress as she answered:

"He was a few instances ago…in fact he did a lot of talking back then…" ..chuckle.

"So?" her voice held a threat.

Hastly, he opened his mouth, but no words would escape. Unconsciously, he coughed and voiced dryly:

"Raphael McCloud, sir – madam! Sorry….I.."

"Alright, McCloud, it was decided that you join the Hellsing Organisation, due to your…encounter tonight. The transferring process is by now completed, be aware of the fact that your former ranks won't be accepted here, currently, you are an ensigne. You will be enrolled in unit III, led by commander Feargousson. Your training will start tomorrow at 9 pm, and until that time, I advise you to sleep as much as you can." She turned, walked away, only to stop again. "And McCloud….get used to moonlight." With that, she left the scene.

Ever so slowly, his heart stopped its drowning rhythm and returned to normal speed again.

"who the hell…?"

"spare me your babbling and follow me, McCloud. I will lead you to your quarters"

"….yes, sure…" was his only reply. _Holy heck, just when do I wake up??_

But yet he had no time for his musing, for the red haired vampires led him towards a huge door that led through yet another long hallway. They passed several doors, all of them looking the same; black iron, heavy gates and the general air of "knock and die". He concluded that this probably should be the troops quarters and in fact he got goose bumps at the thought of living in such a dungeon. But on and on they walked, ascending a staircase, and another. After about 5 minutes of endless, rather depressing hallways, the vampiress stopped and waved a hand to her left, gesturing for him to enter the meant door. As he did so, he nodded his thanks to an uninterested redhead. He entered; the door swung close with a loud and metallic noise that sealed, it seemed, his fate. He walked around, past 3 sets of case beds, 5 of them occupied by a sleeping form. Suddenly he was aware of his shadow being cast on the floor and his head popped up; he found himself looking through a huge set of windows that allowed the moonlight to bathe the room in its colour. On the empty bed he noticed a bundle of stash with his name written on; black vest, black body armour, black army trousers, black boots, gloves, helmet, weapon belt – everything black. "it seems they want me to melt into woodwork…black woodwork…"

Suddenly feeling his drained body screaming for attention, he sank down on the empty bed, slowly removing his scattered gear. Piece after piece of his past life slowly landed on the ground, forming a small bunch of blood-soaked rubbish. He flexed his injured arm and a groan escaped his body, louder than he had wanted.

One of the sleeping forms slowly got up and revealed the sleepy face of a man who apparently just had one eye. He looked at the newbie a bit irritated but as he saw the blood soaked bandages on his arm, he longed for a bundle on his night desk and threw it, wordless but smiling, in the surprised grasp of the new-made ensign.

After tending his arm he flung himself on the bed and stared at the nightsky…"training at 9 pm…and sleep as much as you can…to hell…." He slowly drifted away into a peaceful slumber, not bothered by ghostly beings, hollow hallways or any thought of this mysterious organisation…


End file.
